bLind eyes
by Bumblehigh07
Summary: Matsuda meets an old friend one day while visiting To-Oh.
1. Chapter 1

It almost felt like a crime for Matsuda to step foot on To-Oh Campus property. While it had only been four years since the end of the Kira investigation, to think ten years ago the Mastermind behind it all had been attending the very same University that he now stood in front of was all but mind boggling. He maneuvered the crowd of students around him easily, pausing in front of the directory and reading over the names of faculty. Stopping on one.

 _Prof. Akane Himura - Psychology._

Matsuda's heart went out for the woman. When he had heard she had gone back to teaching, at the same time, he wondered if she had yet to move on from the events of the investigation. He highly doubted she had. While nothing had been official between them, the pain he saw in her blind eyes after Ryuzaki's death was easy enough for him to read. Her heart had been broken.

"Don't dwell on the past, Matsuda," He mildly scolded himself with a shake of his head "It's over and done with." He turned and began back out into the court yard, taking residence on a bench as he watched the students walk by.

Ten years, he thought to himself with a sad sinking feeling in his chest. Ten years since the first Kira murders. Ten years since Ryuzaki. Once again Matsuda shook his head in hopes of warding off the bitter memories of that fateful day. There was not a doubt in his mind that Light Yagami had somehow managed to kill Ryuzaki right under their noses.

"To think he had once been such a good kid.." Touta sipped his coffee and tossed an empty wrapper he had found in his pocket into a nearby garbage bin. He once again found his thoughts trailing back to so any years ago. He could still remember bringing in the young teacher for the first time for questioning. It shocked everyone when they caught sight of her with her walking cane and cloudy aquamarine eyes.

A blind woman could never have been Kira. So she was undoubtedly taken off the suspects list. It was never the last they saw of her however. With Ryuzaki going undercover as a student he had requested that Professor Akane help them with the investigation.

It did not take a genius to see that there had been something between them.

It hurt thinking about when he saw Akane holding him when he died. It hurt even after all these years.

"Wherever you are, I hope you know some people down here really do miss you, Ryuzaki."

He scolded himself for being dragged back into the past. It was never healthy to be hung up on what _could have_ happened. He needed to leave the past in the past and focus on now. Now was his career with the Task Force. Now was when he looked into good colleges for the kids he would have some day. Not today. No, he still went home to an empty apartment and his one cat, Mochi.

But some day.

"Do you have the notes from Psychology?" Matsuda blinked at the new voice, glancing to his left and seeing a small group congregating near the garbage bin. Psychology students.

"Yeah! That new substitute sure doesn't mess around."

"I know!" One girl whined. "He doesn't slow down like Professor Himura! And he's so weird!"

"You say that about every substitute."

"I know but Mr. Ryuzaki really is weird!"

For whatever reason Matsuda found his feet moving towards the group, something making his steps quick as he tightened his hand on his coffee. He called to them when he was just a few steps away.

"Excuse me, I couldn't help overhearing. But did you say you have a teacher named 'Ryuzaki'?"

A blonde student turned to him and nodded when he came up.

"Yes, we do. He's our substitute for Professor Akane."

"He's so weird!" A brunette with raven hair piped in. "He stares at people and walks funny. He even sits weird!"

"How does he sit?" Matsuda asked. He knew, deep in the logical part of himself that there was no way Ryuzaki was alive. Absolutely no way. But the emotional side made his heart pick up in anticipation. Made him think maybe. Just maybe.

"He crouches on the chairs."

Touta swallowed back a lump in his throat, suddenly feeling the need to cry in joy or some other emotion.

"Can you show me which room he's in?" he asked once he felt he was able to speak.

"He should still be packing up. Room 207. If you hurry you might catch him."

Matsuda gave them a quick thanks and goodbye before he was hurrying back into the building. A glance to the directory and then he was practically running down the north wing hall. He was probably stupid for ever thinking that those students could have been talking about Ryuzaki. He had been dead for ten years now. Matsuda visited his grave himself every year.

He skidded to a stop in front of a door marked 207.

He grabbed the handle and threw it open with a shout, "Ryuzaki!"

And there he was.

Matsuda felt his grip on his coffee go slack and the cup fell from his grasp, crashing and spilling the rest of his contents on the ground as he stared at the man carefully filing away papers at a semi-circle wooden desk.

He was crouched in the swivel chair, holding a graded Psychology test between his thumb and forefinger as he would have year ago. The only difference Matsuda could see in his attire was the added lab coat that nearly swallowed him. He always wore his clothes large for comfort. So he figured.

The noise hardly startled him and large black eyes turned to the officer with hardly a flinch. They did widen, ever so slightly and he set the paper down gently.

"Matsuda." He stepped down from the chair, slipping back into the shoes he chose to hardly ever wear unless he were outside. His hunch was still present when he stood, slipping a hand into the pocket of his jeans as he raised the other to point.

"Matsuda, you are cleaning that up."

The Task Force agent looked down the his spilled drink and immediately dropped down as he pulled a napkin from his coat, stuttering out an apology. Just like old time, he thought.

"S-Sorry! Sorry! I'll get this cleaned up right away!" He only had so many napkins from the cafe he had bought his coffee from and they were quickly used up without so much as making a dent in the spill.

"Here." Touta looked up to see the other man holding out a box of tissue, thanking him and taking the box as he began to dab at the stain.

"Still clumsy, I see. Even after all this time." He sighed as he turned and went back to his desk, sorting through the papers and picking up the one he had from earlier.

"I thought for sure you would have changed-"

"Ryuzaki!" Matsuda stood up and threw away the garbage, wiping his hands off and walking further into the room. "I-I don't understand! How are you alive? We all saw you die!"

He blinks and hums as he carefully files away the tests and sessions for next class into the filing cabinet underneath the desk.

"Yes, I suppose you would be curious as to how I'm standing before you right now. It is a very long story." He closes the cabinet and motions to an extra chair that is nearby. "Sit. I will tell you."

Touta wheels the chair close to the desk just as Ryuzaki has crouched back into his own. "I just have to say how happy I am to see you again, Ryuzaki."

"Matsuda, that name is no longer necessary. Ryuzake is merely my teaching name and since you are not a student I would prefer you did not call me by that."

"Oh? Sorry. Would you prefer Ryuga instead?"

"No. L is just fine." Matsuda blinked, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion.

"But aren't you worried?"

"About what? Someone finding out my identity? It is my understanding that Kira has been dead for years now and no new murders have caused suspicion. Plus, to the world and to anyone who does their research, L is dead. Has been so for ten years. I highly doubt we will encounter a situation like the Kira investigation again, so I am free to use whatever name I wish."

There was moment before Touta laughed softly and shook his head.

"You're just as I remember."

"Like wise. Now, there was something you wanted to know?"

"Oh right. How are you alive? And why are you substituting Miss Himura's class? Where is she?"

"To answer you in no specific order, Akane is on Maternity leave and she recommended me to the board."

"Maternity leave?" Matsuda looked ready to start scrating his head in confusion. Then he caught the slight curve of L's smile and his brows shot up to his bangs. "L! You mean you-?"

"Why do you look so surprised, Matsuda?"

"Well I mean-you just never struck me as the type of guy who would let himself be tied down is all!" He laughed and finally took notice to the little band around the other man's finger. Even L managed to marry before he did. There was no question who either.

"Funny you say that, because for the longest time I never did either." He gazed off into space for a moment, humming low as he thought about something Touta would never be able to know.

"Back to the matter at hand. My continued living has everything to do with Akane. What would you like to know?"

"Everything!" Matsuda said as he leaned forward.

L blinked and thumbed his bottom lip as he stared at the younger man. "Everything? Alright then. Then I'll start from the beginning."

"Where's the beginning? During the case?"

"No, no. The _real_ beginning is actually when I first met miss Akane."


	2. Chapter 2

He sees her as she walks through the gates escorted by Mr. Wammy. The first thought in his mind is she's dressed like a doll; A pretty blue dress with lace trimming and a silk blue ribbon tied at her collar, white stockings and polished Mary-Jane's. She's dressed like one of those porcelain dolls he sometimes sees in store windows. Cherry red hair is tied back into a neat little braid, her bangs brushed off to the side allowed him to see her eyes.

Foggy aquamarine eyes.

Mr. Wammy took her inside and he let his curiosity push him into following. There were admittedly not that many girls in The House, and those who were there did not dress like her. Like this little doll with a walking cane. She sits outside Mr. Wammy's office after he asks her to. She doesn't say much, just nods and lets him help her up into the chair. With her cane in her lap she reminds him even more of a doll. Blank eyes stare ahead at nothing, nose and cheeks rosy from the slight Autumn chill that was coming in.

He does nothing but stand behind the corner and watch. She doesn't move from her spot for a total of eleven minutes and twenty-seven seconds until Mr. Wammy comes back out of his office. He has a file folder tucked under his arm. He asks her some questions in a hushed voice, to which she nods yes or no to. When he is done, Wammy stands and helps her down and smiles.

"I think you'll like it here, Akane. Some of the children are very nice."

The girl-Akane-nods again and waits for Wammy to take her hand. When he does he gently leads her along back down the hall towards the bedrooms. He paused just outside the door to the girls' room when he turns his head.

"It's rude to follow people, young man. Come. Introduce yourself to Miss Akane here. No need to be shy."

He moves slowly until he was next to Akane. Neither say anything for a moment, just stand there staring until finally he breaks the silence.

"Hi."

She does not immediately respond. She continues watching him through ghost-like eyes for a moment longer.

"Hello."

The little doll did not like to speak, it seemed. Much like how he did not either.

"The kitchen and bathroom are two doors down the hall to the left," He told her as he carried her bags into the room. Her bed was the one in the corner, near the large pane window that looked out over the courtyard. Most of the children were out there playing.

"There is a 'W' engraved on the brass doorknob. The floorboard in front of it should also squeak when you step there." Mr. Wammy looked over to where they still stood out in the hall and smiled when he realized just what the child was doing. He was giving a blind girl directions only really she could follow.

A door burst open at the end of the hall and two more children came running through, both getting chased by a remote control car and screaming in laughter while doing so. The controller of the car came running after them soon after. They ran past Akane and the other boy, and Mr. Wammy followed them close behind.

"Matthew! Matthew, I thought I warned you against chasing the other children! _Matthew!_ "

Akane blinked and large clouded eyes stared into his where he had pushed her out of the way of the stampede. She had dropped her cane when he shoved her. He slowly pulled back to pick it up off the ground and place it back in her hands. She glanced down to it, blinking before slipping the strap around her wrist and tapping the end on the ground with a small sound.

"Thank you."

"It was no trouble... Matt never learns."

"He likes altering or putting computer chips into toy cars so he may chase the other children with them?" She asked.

"Yes. I think one time he may have even had a water gun attached."

* * *

L paused as he stared at Matsuda, who was resting his chin on his hands and smiling.

"Matsuda, what is with that face?" The Task Force officer blinked and sat up with a nervous chuckle.

"S-Sorry! It's just-it's kinda cute that you and Akane are childhood friends. I can only imagine how excited you were to see her again."

Owlish eyes rose to the ceiling as L hummed, thumbing at his bottom lip and murmuring more to himself than to Matsuda, "Yes. Yes, I would say I was indeed very happy to see her again. Especially after what happened..."

Touta tilted his head. "After...'what' happened?" He watched the ex(?)-detective blink and lower his hand back to his knee before speaking.

"Oh. You heard that. You see, Matsuda, Akane and I had a bit of a disagreement just before she left Wammy's House."

"What was it about?" Matsuda leaned forward in his chair, brows up to his hairline in distress at hearing that _somehow_ L and Akane could have ever disagreed on anything.

"Ironically enough it was about me."

* * *

"L, if I told you a secret would you keep it?"

He stopped his typing and looked over his shoulder where the girl was leaning with her back against his. They had taken solace in the library where he had confiscated one of the computer for his own use and she had been his welcomed company.

"I suppose. Though it really does depend on the severity of it." He heard her hum and watched as she traced on polished red nail over the floor boards, drawing different patterns and equations into the wood that only she could see.

"You're going to hurt your knees if you keep sitting like that," She mused, a small smile playing at her lips. The summer sun poured in through the window and cast it's glow on her, making her appear to be made of gold with flaming hair draping over her shoulders.

"So you have told me. You're stalling, Akane." He resumed his typing, feeling more at ease. He figured that her secret was something she had heard while walking the halls of the house. Perhaps Wammy was going off again because he had stumbled across another child? Or maybe she would just fill the silence with more banter about how he sat or what he ate like she usually did. She was really the only one who he could tolerate the badgering and even reply with his own remarks. He figured that was how that afternoon would go; much like how many others had gone and even evenings and early mornings.

That afternoon however was different. He knew it in an instant.

She sighed, tilted her head back until he felt her hair brushing against the back of his neck and her shoulders sagged against his own. Then she spoke.

"I want to leave Wammy House."

His typing stopped once again, fingers hung frozen in the air as he stared at the screen that was now filled with meaningless chicken scratch. All warmth in the room seemed to have left as the silence between them grew heavy. For the first time, L felt a sort of dread come over him.

"Why? You will be much more successful in life if you stay here." _I don't want you to leave._

"I will only be successful in becoming a detective that would evidently have to go into hiding. No one really knows we exist as it is, but why spend our whole lives living like that?" She asked as she sat up and he turned. Her hair fell over her left shoulder, her bare legs folded under her with the hem of her dress pooling around her in a snow-colored puddle. She still looked like a doll. Even after all this time.

"Do you not want to help put criminals away where they belong?" He asked. He watched her shake her head.

"No. I don't. I don't want to be a detective like you, L. I want to go and study."

"Study what?" He spoke too quickly, his movements and speech too rushed. He was _scared_. She waits for a moment, brows furrowing in concern as she looked in his vague direction. She had heard the catch in his voice.

"The mind," She says at last. "I want to study the human mind... Why are ours hard-wired so differently? What makes them like that? That is what I want to study."

"You can learn that all here," He says. "I'm sure Wammy will not mind in ordering audio books." _You do not have to leave._

But Akane shook her head and stood, her cane gripped tight in her hand. "I don't _want_ audio books," She retorted. "I want to learn so I may _teach it._ I want to teach people, L." She felt the rush of air as he stood with her, taking a step back but her gaze never wavering. "I cannot earn a teaching degree if I stay here."

He always has a comeback. He always knows what to say and how to have the last word. But now he was stuck frozen in silence. He did not know what to say.

"You can do better than teaching." He finally decides on. "Whomever you teach, they won't appreciate your knowledge. You'll never make it."

"How can you say such a thing?" She gasped, stricken with shock at his reaction. "You haven't a clue how anyone will react to my teaching! Just because you never liked any of your teachers does not mean everyone else won't!"

"Teachers are nothing but playthings for society," He grit.

"How _dare_ you-"

"No one out there will ever believe that a blind woman can make it in the world of Education, Akane. Which is why you will be better off just staying _here_ where you can learn how to do something meaningful like I-"

The slap came quick and unaccounted for, his left cheek stinging harshly and no doubt the skin would be left with a red tint. She stood there with tears rising and her bottom lip trembling in anger. He waited for her to scream at him and curse him out like she was _surely_ going to do. He wanted her to yell. He wanted the emotional explosion that only she knew how to made beautiful even when covered in tears.

What he got was silence. Resentful infuriated silence.

Then she is storming towards the door, bare feet quiet against the wood all the way till she disappears into the hall. He watches her and slowly raises a hand to his cheek. It's warm to the touch and still throbbing with a dull ache. He deserved it.

Akane is gone the next morning. Her bags are packed and he watches from the window as she climbs into the waiting car, Wammy closing the door after she is in. The man glanced up and met his eyes for a moment before the contact was quickly broken as he ducked his head and climbed into the driver's seat.

Once again, he deserves it.

* * *

Matsuda sits in stunned silence as L plays with the puddle of condensation left on the desk from his water bottle.

"She was gone? Just like that?"

"Just like that." L almost seemed to sigh, using the edge of his coat to wipe away the puddle and return his gaze back to the younger man in front of him. "That was the last time I saw her for the next ten years."

"How old were you?" Touta asked quietly, his happier charm from earlier dissipating to make room for the wave of pity that came with the new story.

"Thirteen."

Touta whistled low as he slipped farther down in his chair, a frown tugging at his features as he avoiding the other man's eyes.

"I'm sorry," He murmured."

"There's no reason to apologize, Matsuda," L quipped. "What happened, happened. Much as I would like to change it, I cannot. So there is no point in dwelling on the past." Matsuda nodded slowly, eyes still fixed on noting before his brows furrowed and he looked up.

"Hang on... You said 'ten years'? That means you reunited with Akane..." His brows lifted once more as L nodded.

"During the Kira investigation. Indeed."

"Talk about a small world, huh?" He chuckled. The curve of a smile made itself known on L's face once more.

"Small world indeed, Matsuda."

"It's funny. I remember you always acting a bit different around her. You almost always seemed-nervous. I'm guessing you hadn't made up immediately off the bat?"

L shook his head. "No. Akane was, understandably, less than thrilled to see me again." He almost seemed to shrink in on himself, eyes down in memory. "I did not blame her then, and I do not now. I acted out of character and childishness."

Matsuda felt like reaching out and putting a hand on the other man's shoulder, but the last time something even close to that happened, L proved to the entire task force just how ready he was to start throwing his kicks. Still, he couldn't help but want to comfort him somehow.

"So.. when did you and Akane make up? I noticed you two began acting like-well, like old friends half way through the investigation." For a moment, the smile was back on L's face.

"Truthfully, there was no specific date or time that she evidently forgave me. It was really a collaboration of events that lead up to it. But..." He gazed up at the ceiling again, lolling his head a bit before exhaling slowly. "I believe it started... when I followed Light Yagami to this very Academy. I still remember it very clearly..."

* * *

The last of the students were beginning to file into the room, taking whatever empty seat they could find left over. It was almost endearing to watch so many young faces in one place ready to learn whatever the topic of the class was. Not that he cared really, he true focus was the man some rows ahead of him.

 _Kira_.

He was absolutely certain that Light was behind the recent murder wave of criminals. He just needed some way to prove it. That was always the difficult part.

 _The cameras set up in his room proved nothing,_ He thought to himself just as the door slammed shut behind the last student. The teacher was still nowhere to be seen. _The only course of action I need to take next is to get close to him. Light **has** to be stopped._

He was still musing to himself even when the teacher slipped into the room. But the tapping was what brought him out of his thoughts.

Tap. Tap. Tap.

 _Tap. Tap. Tap. Went her cane against the floor as she walked. Tap. Tap. Tap. Everywhere she went._

Ryuzaki focused his eyes at the last second.

She was in a formal blouse and skirt, her heels clicked against the floor that kept in time with the tapping of her cane. Her hair was pulled up into a neat bun, bangs brushed aside so he may see her eyes.

 _Foggy aquamarine eyes._

"Good Morning, everyone," She chimed with a gentle smile that revealed a row of straight white teeth. "Welcome to Intro to Psychology. I will be your instructor." To everyone's surprise (aside from his own), she picked up a piece of chalk and wrote in neat cursive on the chalk board.

 _Professor Akane Himura._


	3. Chapter 3

The lesson ended without any problems and the students packed up their things, gathered with their friends and emptied the room in a wave like they had come in as. He brought no bag with him so he did not need to clean up or pack his things like everyone else, including his Kira suspect.

But it was unlikely Light would go very far from the academy. Not when he clearly had other classes to attend to, not to mention lunch. He could let him out his sight for a moment.

He had been staring at her all hour long all while she gave insight to her students of what they should expect with her class. He never did catch all of what she said however, because he had been too busy staring and taking in everything that ten years had put her through.

He would be lying if he said Akane did not grow up into a beautiful woman. She had filled out well, feminine curves more pronounce then they were the last he saw her when puberty was just beginning to look at them. She held an aura of authority about her while carrying herself proud like she always did, ready to approach anyone and be approached by anyone. She was well respected by her students, he could tell by how well they paid attention to her and how some even said their goodbyes on their way out.

Akane was doing just fine as a teacher.

For the first time he would gladly admit he was wrong.

"Class is over."

She is suddenly there in front of him, looking down at him in a way she never used to and a way he was not familiar with. The tables were suddenly turned. Suddenly he was the student and she was his better. His superior. It takes him another moment to collect himself, to carefully step down from his chair and stand.

She was taller than the last he saw her. She was nearly looking him in the eye.

"My apologies. I was just thinking about something and lost track."

He watched her expression soften into a gentle smile as her weight shifted and her back straightened. Perfect posture. Ever like Akane.

"I see. However, I hope this does not become a regular thing of not paying attention in my class. I do expect your full participation, Mr-?"

For a split second he had a moment to choose. Would he be L or would he be Ryuga? Ryuga was his safest chance to avoid death. Least for the time being.

But L ensured him Akane remembered.

"Hideki Ryuga, Ma'am."

Something inside him twists as he lies and only twists harder as she laughs softly.

"Like the famous pop-star. I'm sure you get confused with him often."

She leads him down the aisle and when he goes for the door, she heads for her desk to slide her bag over her shoulder and grab her cane once more. There is a bitter taste on the back of his tongue for not telling her, for not saying _something_.

"Goodbye, Miss Akane."

"Goodbye, Ryuga," She calls from her desk.

He opens the door and pauses once more. He never did have a guilty conscience but it is his guilt that makes him turn once more before leaving her room.

"Akane, I'm sorry for what I said. You were right."

The door closes behind him with a heavy thud before she can ask him what he meant. He is sure she is confused. She has to be.

Ryuzaki makes a point to Soichiro to bring in Akane Himura for questioning a week after following Light to To-Oh.

"We can ask her to be a sort of surveillance for us."

"You're asking me to bring in my son's teacher, so she may watch over my son?" He asks.

"Yes, that is exactly what I'm asking."

Soichiro had never been accepting of Ryuzaki's accusing his son of being Kira. What father in their right mind would? However, he respected Ryuzaki as a detective and as a man who knew what he was talking about. But even he had to draw the line somewhere.

"I don't approve of all this spying you're doing on Light," He said with a deep frown. "Asking Miss Akane to be part of it seems too much. Excessive even."

Of coarse Ryuzaki would never admit but Soichiro was right. It was excessive. Downright overkill. He was being selfish; Using his Kira suspect as a way to contact a woman he was too afraid of speaking to face-to-face.

Selfish indeed.

"Very well."

Soichiro seemed taken aback by just how quick Ryuzaki was to back down, to recede and show his belly in submission.

"I will not have Miss Himura as surveillance for Light Yagami. But I do wish to ask her questions about his behavior. Perhaps she noticed something we have missed."

Soichiro nods, expression hardening back into professionally neutral. "I'll have Matsuda and Aizawa pick her up. When do you want her?"

 _Now. Five minutes ago. Two months ago. Ten years ago._

"Tomorrow will work best. After she is done with classes so we do not inconvenience her."

"Pardon my asking but when do you care about being an inconvenience?" Soichiro asks. To his surprise, he sees the man crouching before him freeze, owlish eyes staring at his coffee cup intently in silence. He fears he may have struck an invisible nerve with the question and quickly makes an attempt to take it back.

"Ryuzaki, I didn't-"

"It's quite alright, Chief Yagami." His voice is quiet, momentarily losing the monotonous sound to it and filled with some sort of emotion Soichiro never heard from him before. "However, it is to my understanding that Miss Akane is a very busy woman. She takes her teaching very seriously and I've a feeling if we attempt to take her during one of her classes she would not go easily."

"Ah. Understandable. We'll have her down at Headquarters ready for interrogation." The Chief of the Task Force turned away from the man crouching in his chair, his footsteps heavy and quieted against the hotel's carpeted floor. He was just about to open the door when the other spoke up again.

"Chief Yagami." At the sound of his name, Soichiro paused and looked at him again.

"Yes, Ryuzaki?"

"I would like to personally interrogate Miss Akane. If that is not too much trouble. I will have Watari contact you with the address where I would like you to bring her."

"Of coarse. I'll see to it it's done."

"Thank you, Mr. Yagami. And goodnight."

"Goodnight, Ryuzaki." The rustle of clothing as he pulled on his coat, the unlocking of the hotel door, and then Soichiro was gone.

* * *

Matsuda paused from taking a sip of his water, having stepped out to go to the cafeteria, and set the bottle down on the desk. "From the sound of it, it almost seemed like you were _afraid_ of talking to Akane."

"I suppose because in a sense, I was." L had produced a box of Meiji crackers upon Matsuda's return and had even been kind enough to share them. Matsuda had taken one only out of politeness. He knew how much L cherished his sweets and quietly munched away as he went on with his story.

"What were you afraid of?" Touta asked.

"Honestly? I was afraid that she was still upset. That she would never forgive me. But perhaps most of all-" L paused once more, eyeing his little panda biscuit as if it had all the answers in the world and he need only ask it a question. "-I suppose I was afraid that would be the last time we speak again." He set down the snack, seeming to have lost his appetite. "But I was also afraid that if she did forgive me, she would have want to help with the investigation. That she would put her life on the line like I at the time. That was what _terrified_ me, Matsuda. Because if I am honest-" He lift his head, charcoal-grey eyes meeting Matsuda's chestnut colored ones. "-if Akane had died because of me, I'm almost one-hundred percent sure that I would have given up the case."

Matsuda gaped at the honesty and severity of L's confessional. It was nearly maddening to think that anything aside from death could stop L from his detective work and putting criminals to justice. But the way he spoke about Akane and how sincere he appeared had Matsuda believing that if Akane really did die during the investigation, Light may have just gotten away.

"She really means that much to you?" He asked after the silence had settled once again. The substitute nodded.

"Yes. She does."

"Can I ask?" Matsuda shifted in his chair, crossing his legs and folding his hands. "What did you ask when you interrogated her? You both looked a little off afterwards."

"I never actually interrogated Akane. I had only asked to have her brought in so I could have a moment to speak with her. There were many things I needed to say to her that I only had the chance to at that moment."

* * *

 _Tap. Tap. Tap._

The tapping matched her every step as she walked, being lead by both Matsuda and Aizawa down a new hotel's carpeted halls, softening the crack of her cane until it was just a gentle thump against the floor. She had been silent all the way up to that point, expression carefully blank and unreadable.

"Right this way, Miss Himura." Aizawa held the door open for her and Matsuda lead her through. The room had been transformed into a makeshift headquarters, with microphones and camera lenses everywhere and loose wires connected to computers shifted out of the way to avoid tripping. They helped her sit down in one of the only two chairs in the room. Aizawa fixed a microphone her way and turned on the recorder.

"We'll send someone in to ask you some questions shortly. Do you understand?" She nodded. "Miss Himura, please say so."

"Yes, I understand."

"Thank you."

Both men exited the room. Ryuzaki had asked for privacy and that was what they would give him. As per Chief Yagami's orders.

Akane sat there for a moment or two, staring at nothing and holding her cane and listening. She could hear the traffic outside muffled by the windows. A whir of a computer. A distant thud from down the hall as another hotel patron entered their room. She could even hear the breathing of the other person sitting just across from her. They were not attempting to be quiet either. They _wanted_ her to know they were there.

"Hello again, Miss Akane."

"Hello, Ryuga. If I may be able to call you that." There was an edge to her voice that he knew would be coming, that had every right to be there because _he did not tell her._

"Ryuga was the name I used to get into To-Oh," He explained. "Kira needs only a name to be able to kill. I was only taking precautions." The air was thick with the tension between them and only growing worse. It was near suffocating.

She finally moved, taking her hand off her cane where it was across her lap so she may fold her arms over her chest and glower at him. Her attire was different today. She had a black blazer over her dress shirt, three silver buttons keeping the garment closed, and a pleated rose-colored skirt that hugged her hips and had swayed when she walked. Black stockings and leather ankle boots with buckles that jingled quietly. Her hair was loose around her shoulders with a gently curl to it. It was an oddly fierce change, yet suited her very well.

"So tell me then," She said and snapped him out of his dazing off. "What am I supposed to call you while we're here? Since you're not using your real name."

"Ryuzaki will be just fine." Her blind glare only worsened, lips pursing and brows furrowing in annoyance. Perhaps he would be annoyed too if he were in her position. He would be very annoyed.

Silence passes by them for another ten minutes, neither of them making any move to break it. She is waiting for him and he is waiting for her. An apology. An accusation. Whichever came first. Both were just waiting. Half an hour passes and still neither have said anything, the electric numbers on the digital clock read it's just a little passed seven o'clock.

"You suspect one of my students to be Kira." It is a statement. Not a question but he is just glad she said something.

"That is correct." He watches her fingers tap on the armrest, red nails clicking against the wood quietly. An old habit he had long ago grown comfortable with.

"Let me guess. You believe it is Light Yagami." He almost relaxes, almost feels like they are talking like they would years ago. But while he could let his guard down, hers was very much still up.

"Yes. May I ask how you deduced that?"

"Mr. Yagami is an aspiring student academically and a supposedly well-adjusted young man socially. His test scores do not show even a speck of how intelligent he is. Meaning, with the fact Kira needs only a name and presumably a face in order to kill, and with his father being the Chief of police I do not hold it under Mr. Yagami to be able to hack into his father's work computer where he no doubt will have names and faces of recent or wanted criminals. I recall you gave the entrance speech with him. Both of you scored perfect on the entrance exams. In the few years of teaching at To-Oh I have learned many things about those exams. You are either very lucky, which is highly unlikely, or you have an IQ ranging anywhere from one-hundred-thirty to anywhere over one-hundred-sixty and even possibly two hundred but the percentage of people with that high an of IQ is immensely low."

If she had been able to see, she would have seen a smile slowly spread itself on his face. Just as he remembered.

"Very impressive, Miss Akane. Very few would have been able to come to that conclusion."

A hint of a smile pulled at the corner of her lips. Her shoulders slackened and rest against the back of the chair, muscles loosening and relaxing under the familiar pressure of friendly conversation. It seemed she missed it just as much as he had.

"Not many have our intelligence, Ryu." And just like that the nicknames come. For just a moment, there is no Kira investigation, there is no interrogation room or cameras or microphones. But it is just them back in that library. Back when everything made sense and felt right. The air in the room felt warm despite the setting sun's disappearing light.

He knew however, that he needed to break the comfort in order to tell her. It was an uphill battle from here.

"Akane, I really did mean it when I said I was sorry." Whatever smile she may have had fell as she sat up, tense and stiff and staring at him. It was amazing how much emotion even clouded eyes like hers could hold. But Akane made emotion beautiful. She made tears look like crystal and a funeral seem like an Edgar Allen Poe poem.

"Is that so?" She asks softly. "I had thought so. You sounded sincere... I didn't want to believe it had been you at first. Then when I did I wanted to hit you." She didn't see him wince some. Thankfully. "Once I calmed down I figured it would not be long before you asked me to come in."

"You've been expecting this." She nodded.

"Yes, I have..." She falls off into a moment of thought, eyes angled up the way they did when they were young. Old habits were hard to break. "...I've missed you, Ryuzaki," She whispered and he froze. He had been handling a coffee cup and nearly dropped it in shock, setting it back down on the coaster.

"Could-could you say that again?" He makes the excuse that the microphones are not sensitive enough to hear her whispering. In reality he just needed to be sure he had heard her.

"I said I missed you. I've missed your company, Ryuzaki. I realized that a long time ago." She curls a hand around her cane, thumbing over the smooth metal absentmindedly in what he could only suspect is a comforting motion.

It was out there now. Everything that needed to be said was said but she had thrown him for a potential loop. Akane had been more open with her emotions, yet she still sometimes even startled him. Ryuzaki reached out and turned off the recorder, then turned off all the microphones in the room.

"I've missed you too."

* * *

"Matsuda," L deadpanned. "You're making that face again."

Touta didn't bother hiding his smile. He couldn't.

"I'm sorry," He said. "But this story, you and Akane, it all sounds like some sort of romance novel! Childhood friends meeting up again after a falling out, coming together to solve the biggest murder mystery in history, only to be tragically stopped by death itself?" Matsuda would admit it to himself but to no one who asked, but he was a sucker for a good romance story.

This was the most romantic one he had the pleasure of hearing.

"I'm glad you're enjoying yourself. However, if you keep making that face I'm going to have to kick you." The look of horror on Matsuda's face would have won a gold metal in timing. He quickly reassured him that he was only kidding and he did not have to be so serious.

"That wasn't funny, L," Touta whined. "I've seen you kick people. It doesn't look fun."

"It's fun on my part."

"Can we get back to the story please?" Touta begged.

"Yes, I suppose. Though I'm almost done." Matsuda nearly dislocated a shoulder with how fast they fell in disappointment.

"What?"

"Matsuda, you have to remember. _I was dead._ I am only telling you what I can."

The younger man ducked his head down in embarrassment. "Sorry. I guess I'm getting a little bit too into this. Go ahead."

* * *

Akane quickly became a valuable asset of the investigation. She kept close tabs on Light Yagami through her lessons and had come back once saying that he often muttered to himself.

"I don't mean the muttering one does when they are lost in thought. He almost appears to be having conversations with himself." Her face scrunched in confusion. "I once thought he mentioned apples at some point."

"Apples?" Ryuzaki echoed.

"Apples."

He revealed to her in private the suicide letters left by three prisoners before they had died.

"L, do you know that Shinigami love apples? Do you think it's some sort of taunt?" She asked after Watari had served her coffee.

"I assume yes. Why else would he so blatantly leave such an poorly coded message?"

Akane hummed as she sipped at her drink, eyes closed as she inhaled the nutty aroma of that day's brew. "It's unlikely he made a mistake. He's calling you out. Though, about this Shinigami..." Once again her brows furrowed. "Could it be he is calling himself a God of Death to spite you?"

"Possible. I will keep that in mind. You did hear him muttering about apples." It was impossible for there to be any work of a Shinigami in play. Shinigami did not exist. Simply figments of man who wanted to find a way to explain the unexplained. Even still, the coincidence was not to be over looked.

* * *

"L?"

The crouching man paused once more, tilting his head as he looked at the Task Force agent. "Yes?"

He watched as Matsuda fidgeted, looking like a child who had been caught with his hand in the cookie jar.

"I was just wondering," He started. "If maybe we can skip all this? I want to know when you and Akane began to fall in love!" He clasped his hands together tightly as he leaned forward in his chair. "I was there when all this happened but I want to know about everything else!"

L hummed as he chewed a nail, staring at the younger individual and considering his proposal. Touta wasn't wrong in that he had been there at the time of these events. He supposed it would make sense to tell him about everything else.

"Alright. If it will make yo-" He was interrupted by his cell phone. Digging through his pockets and retrieving it, he pressed green and raised it to his ear. "Hello? _What?_ " His demeanor suddenly changed and he stood from his seat, shoulders tense and eyes wide as they stared at nothing. "Alright. I'm on my way. Matsuda and I will meet you at the hospital." He hung up and grabbed his bag. Matsuda had never seen him move so fast before and he scrambled to follow him out the door.

"L, wait! What's goi-"

"Matsuda, I need you to drive to the hospital. Drive five miles over every speed limit."

"Why?" The suited man hurried after him, fumbling for his keys as L made a beeline for his car.

"Because," He said as he waited for Matsuda to unlock the doors while looking more impatient by the second. "That was Aizawa. Akane's water broke and she is going into labor."


End file.
